had me a blast
dick in my ass
one time i forced my mom to play pokemon for at least half an hour and all she did was catch a butterfree and name it lowfat
The second worst burn that Two Face has ever felt.
When it comes to cooking, not everyone is at the same skill level
*gordon ramsay voice* what the fuck is this
why is underwear so expensive like wtf its a sheet of fabric that covers ur dinky doo
remember when the rock was on hannah montana
Lemony Snicket (via paintdeath)
Me trying to finish something important on time:
YOU. MOTHER. FUCKER.
the entire history of our universe came together in such a way that allowed this pun to happen